Borderline personality disorder
“The essential feature of borderline personality disorder is a pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image and feelings, and marked impulsivity that begins in early adulthood and is present in a variety of situations.”
According to DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders)
As you can see, instability is a characteristic that affects the functionality of a person with borderline. They also have problems with anger and expressing anger, feeling anger very intensely and expressing themselves verbally or physically violently towards the person who has provoked this feeling and have difficulty controlling it. Personality disorders generally cannot be fully treated, but with the help of psychotherapy and medication, symptoms can be improved and quality of life can be enhanced.
Childhood origins of borderline personality disorder:
1. Unsafe family environment
This environment generates suffering from physical, sexual or verbal abuse. There was a constant threat of abuse or abandonment from parents or carers. He may be left alone for a very long time or the parent shows extreme mood swings (angry-willing). Attachment is unstable and insecure.
2. Depressing home environment
3. Rough family environment
4. Subjugating family environment
The child is not allowed to express his/her needs and feelings. There are rules about what the child can and cannot express.
Symptoms of borderline personality disorder:
- Sustained effort to avoid abandonment by others
- Intense fear of being abandoned
- They consider them “bad” or “worthless”
- They don’t tolerate loneliness and need someone to be near
- Rapid shift from idealizing to devaluing your partner and the people around you
- Feeling that their partner is not enough for them, that they don’t offer enough
- Have an unstable and self-critical self-image
- Increased impulsivity (reckless driving, excessive spending, etc.)
- Self-mutilation
- Sadness, anxiety, irritability – lasting a few hours, and only rarely a few days
- The feeling of inner emptiness
Managing emotions
People with borderline personality traits fail to manage their emotions effectively. They have a heightened sensitivity to the emotions, gestures and words of others, and feel emotions very intensely. Mainly, they feel negative emotions and find it difficult to reduce their intensity. A person with borderline feels a wide range in the same day, from happiness, sadness, anger, shame, guilt. This cycle can be exhausting.
They usually use inappropriate coping strategies, such as suppressing their thoughts, or avoiding negative emotions and thoughts by not thinking or taking up excessive time. They may resort to various self-destructive methods to manage their feelings, such as alcohol, smoking, drugs or self-mutilating behaviours.
Strategies to help with emotional management could be cognitive reappraisal, reinterpreting a situation that has caused us anger or sadness, and reducing the personal significance of the situation and emotional relevance. People with borderlines are also encouraged to detach themselves from the situation and try to solve problems or accept situations they cannot change. At the same time, it is important first to detach themselves from the situation and think about the situation from a neutral perspective, as if they are not directly involved in the situation.
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